An Open Argument to Women-on-Women Hate☺
Dear W.W.H.O.W (Women Who Hate on Other Women), I am writing this letter to you today because it has been brought to my attention that not only are women judged crucially by men, society, the government, dogs, and probably aliens on Mars, they're judged by other women as well. Oh the irony. This probably isn't a surprise to you already, because you've probably been spending your days on a nice cottage in Vermont, swiping through Instagram, dishing out the latest gossip on other women's posts. "You wear way too much makeup", "You shouldn't post a body positivity picture, it's just you asking for attention", "Your cat isn't even cute, Jennifer". Well, here is a nice little public service announcement for you all. It's rude. And that's just the tip of the iceberg. I'm not sure if you're all aware of this, but humans have a choice. *gasp* And... wait for it, this is the craziest part... Women are humans too. *poof* Mind-blown. Therefore, since women are identified as apart of the human species, they have a choice to do whatever they please with their bodies, actions, and personal image. I also understand you have just as much the right to judge these women, because this is a "free country" and all. Just thought I would mention, a woman sharing the personal glorification of her body does not have a negative impact on anyone else. It actually adds another optimistic & generally happy human being to this crazy, psychopathic, depressing world. Now, who is that harming? You couldn't possibly think it's you, do you? Because I'm pretty sure your eyes will not fall out of your sockets and bleed, your insides won't disintegrate and dissolve, cats will not come out of nowhere in hoards of 60 and claw your face to shreds because some girl is posting a picture of her "side-boob". Women have sex. Men have sex. Women post pictures of their bodies on social media. Men post pictures of their bodies on social media. In a world full of double standards, women should be trying to knock these expectations down, not making them a bigger issue by joining in and shaming women for their actions. We are all separate individuals, and what one woman might agree with, another may not. Disagreements aside, if you don't like something someone is doing, don't assume you have the right to judge them for their behavior, unless it is directly affecting you and harming your happiness. You, as the critic, don't have the power. Not in the case of when a woman is glorifying her body using social media, or having consensual sex, or wearing whatever she pleases and being fully aware of the fact that she made that decision. If a woman is posting a photo of herself in little to no clothing, she has the consent and the power over everyone. She is the one posting the picture, putting on or taking off the clothes, and can leave the situation at any time. She has the power. She has the consent. That is what makes it sexually empowering. When you tear down a woman, whether you are aware you are doing it or not, you are actually sexually objectifying her. Majdoline Lyazidi, a twenty-year-old Morocco resident, created the SlutWalk. "SlutWalks have protested rape culture in general and specifically zeroed into the practice of slut shaming and victim blaming. The marches have also been sites of female sexual celebration, where displays of female sexuality are presented as acts of self-expression rather than invitations aimed at men." (Hackman, Rose. Amber Rose Interview). “I’ve been called a slut while I was still a virgin. I have been called a slut while I was in a committed relationship with my husband," American model, actress, and entrepreneur, Amber Rose, says. “So it really doesn’t matter what you do in life, people can call you that name because they are uncomfortable with your sexuality. That’s all it is.” Sexual empowerment and body positivity have been symbols of strength for women everywhere. It gives them the right to be free of their sexuality without judgment or contradictions. Or at least that's what the goal is. If you're uncomfortable with someone's sexuality and actions, it takes nothing to simply accept them, because by casting judgement on other women for being "sluts and whores", it affects other womens lives, whether you notice or not. Besides, women calling other women derogatory statements just gives men more of a reason to deem us with the same exact derogatory statements. "Oh, well if women can hate on other women, then I can too! I've casted judgment on other women. It's a difficult thing to not do. As humans, our second nature is to share our opinions as much as we possibly can. Society is designed to make women believe that men want us for our bodies and as objects of satisfaction, but if we give them what they demand, even for our own pleasure, we are the ones to blame and the ones at fault. How is that fair? It's not. There is no win for women. It doesn't help one bit. But being tolerant, and understanding, and respectful towards women who go through the same exact struggles as we deal with, but maybe in extraordinarily different ways, helps a ton. We all enter this world, and we all leave this world. Don't spend it worrying about what other women are doing with their time and reputation. Accept them as a sister, and stand together. There are bigger issues to deal with, and the only way they will be solved is is if we bring each other up. Not tear each other down.
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affirmation
[af-firm-a-tion] something that is affirmed; a statement or proposition that is declared to be true Well I don't know if any of these goals.. dreams.. affirmations, are true, I don't even know if they'll happen. All I know is I want more of them in my life, or at least in the next 12 months. Here are 7 of my affirmations that I want to ring true in the new year. ➊ Ineffable moments Moments that are too good to describe in words. These moments are rare to come by, but I want hundreds of them. ➋ Cats. All the cats. Every one of them. This one is self explanatory. Who doesn't want millions of cats? Don't answer that. ➌ Serendipity I'm a planning/scheduling whore (that's a terrible sentence, I know, bare with me.) I try to plan every moment of every day, because I hate surprises and I have been losing my mind over the semester, that if I don't plan ahead of time, something goes missing, something gets broken, I fail at life basically. I need more moments that aren't planned. Just me letting go and not giving into my schedule. ➍ Aurora The word literally means "dawn". It's my favorite part of the day, even though I'm usually asleep for it. It reminds of what the day has in store. Fresh starts, clear skies, or maybe a cloudy storm. Everything is calm, and everything is fair. I want more aurora. More pictures, more moments, more early mornings and coffee breaks, just to slow down and start back up again. ➎ Epiphanies My biggest goal is to start figuring out and having a sudden realization for what I want to do in life. I know I want to write, but I have absolutely no idea what job is going to give me a comfortable lifestyle and allow me to do the thing I love most. A lifestyle that will let me have the opportunities I want and let me live this short existence as happily as I can. ➏ Speak with more eloquence Just the word eloquence itself is gorgeous. 2016 will be the year I find my words. My urge to write, to speak, and to use terms without having to reach for a thesaurus. There are so many words in the world, why wouldn't you want to learn them all? Plus, you come off as incredibly intelligent. Life tip. ➐ Be more valiant I'm pretty fearless when it comes to most things. But I am fearful of many things as well. In 2016 I don't want my fears or my comfort zone to get in the way of what I want. If I want to buy a big grown up girl purse and use it for this mediocrity we call high school, hell.. I'll do it. This is the year I'm unflinching towards getting my broke ass a job, testing for my license, and doing anything I want. Being free of fear. Those are my goals. My aspirations. My affirmations. Good luck on your journey through 2016. xoxo I've decided that every title for a post I write about during the winter break (this is probably the last one considering break is over Monday) is going to be my current jams. And you're welcome, because I have great taste in music.
Recently I have enjoyed the word catharsis. Doesn't it just sound fancy. It really means to release or, in a sense, purge. That sounds terrifying, ever since I've seen The Purge (solid 2 out of 5, terrible horror movie, if you can even call it that. Just a warning), but I like the idea of it all. To be stressed, overwhelmed, scared, or depressed, and to have a word that solves all your problems. If you can just find the thing that makes you feel like releasing your struggles. I do so many things to release my worries and feelings and emotions, basically because I am an emotional wreck half the time and my brain has no other mechanism to let go. Obviously I write. I find using words to string together worries and feelings and emotions absolutely mesmerizing, and I want to become a pro at it. I also eat. A lot. Give me anything, I'll eat it. Except barbecue sauce. That's disgusting. I was watching an episode of Brooklyn Nine Nine, and Detective Jake Peralta just got out of a bad break up, and his friends kept telling him "Catharsis, catharsis, catharsis", urging him to release his sorrows through a game of hostages, terrorists, and cops (It's a good show, I promise). But not only did I remember it because it was one of the vocabulary words in my English class... what am I saying? Of course that's the only reason I remembered it. Thanks Ms. Baker, see? Your quizzes are totally working. I find the idea of finding something you love and aspire to do, and that being the same thing that helps you release your worries, thoughts, feelings, fears, and stresses, amazing. I'm lucky for the opportunity to have catharsis. To write, to pray, to rant, to read, to draw (or scribble chicken scratch onto canvas paper, in my case), to eat, to be comforted, to cuddle, to be close with others, to talk, to speak, to be literate, to think, to just be human.. Wonderful. Find your release. Catharsis the heck out of life. |
AuthorGrace Willcox. High school student. Likes to think of herself as cunning & witty. Probably isn't. Enjoy. Archives
March 2017
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